Observations as I Miss My Parents

I had wonderful parents. News flash, they were human; therefore, they were imperfect. When I was younger, I couldn’t forgive them for being human. In my pride I was convinced I could do better, be better. I was so set on doing certain things differently than they had done that I didn’t focus on what they did right. Rather, I didn’t want to admit what they did right until later. It was much easier to focus on the things I felt they did wrong, or at least what I felt hurt me, or rather, annoyed and inhibited me in some way. Because you know, when one is immature, feelings are all that matter. I don’t believe this generation is the only one focused on feelings; most young adults share this focus until they mature beyond it. I hope it only seems worse today because the media, mostly social media, is expounding on it. I hope.

I read Mere Christianity by CS Lewis almost 30 years ago. I was gobsmacked. His understanding was so simple but profound. It didn’t dwell on the shoulds and shouldn’ts of “religion” but rather the relationship we can have with God because Jesus was our sacrifice, once for all. All we had to do was admit we aren't perfect and tell Jesus we are glad he took our place. When I finished the book, I wondered why these truths weren’t taught, and why religion still didn’t focus on what the individual can do rather than on what God has done.

I have also read other brilliant people, such as John Adams and GK Chesterton, to name a few. Why hasn’t their wisdom been absorbed and learned from over the last 100 years? I’d wager that the young adults in their lives thought they were ridiculous, as I did my parents because they focused on their flaws instead of positive things.

No one likes to be told what to do. Not really. We like to discover for ourselves. Be it pride or control, we simply don’t like it.  When someone says something that might sound like instructions, we bristle and/or turn our heads away, even if it sounds sensible, sometimes especially if it sounds sensible. We simply don’t want to be told. Or is that just me?

Now, on one hand, a person who doesn’t want to listen can be a fabulous thing. This kind of person can be a go-getter, a self-starter that may not need approval from someone else to get started. On the other hand, this person can be so self-centered or immature that they won’t or can’t listen, even when the other person is correct. I suppose a mature person must strive for a balance.

How sad that we choose to miss out on great instruction for pride or selfishness. But here we are, we humans.

There are many things that could keep us from learning from others. Laziness, self-centeredness, busyness, the desire to fit in with a certain group, the desire to be different from another group, or lack of time due to trying to survive. But I hope that when we are confronted with profound truths, we can listen and consider, no matter who is in the group.

One of the reasons we might not want to listen is perhaps we have a desire to be different from what and who went before us. We tend to think that new is better, that surely those people that had the audacity to age and die surely don’t know as much as I do as a young vibrant person. Our pride might believe that perhaps their wisdom has aged out and is no longer true. But, if we aren’t willing to learn from those who went before us, we are wasting our own time and missing out on so much beauty.

There is beauty and knowledge in the old libraries, yes, some of the knowledge is outdated, but some of the current knowledge will also soon be outdated. The wisdoms, however, are timeless. True wisdom doesn’t age. Science does, yes…but not true wisdom. We can read Proverbs and see that the wisdom there still reverberates.

The wisest man in history spoke often of wisdom and how the lack of it leads to folly.

Which brings me to another point. It seems young adults who focus on feelings resent the rules of the Old Testament. They’d like us to see Jesus as kind only, not righteous, because it would be easier not to be called to be righteous. Yet the wisdom and teachings of the Old Testament were not dispatched with Jesus coming, they were fulfilled. He didn’t negate the teachings, only made it simpler to be in His presence. We don’t need a priest or a sacrifice; He gives us His righteousness instead. The rules still apply, especially those ten.

After all, there is only ONE with wisdom that truly matters.

Before anyone gets angry at my words, this is what I've come to believe as I learned from myself and others. Everyone is different, but don't let hurt feelings make you miss great things.